In this episode of Sex, God, & Chaos, Ben and Roane open up about the realities of chaos, betrayal, addiction, and the long road toward healing. After reflecting on near-death experiences, friendship, and gratitude, they unpack three phases of recovery—from the disorienting early days of emotional upheaval to the deeper work of dependence, community, and spiritual transformation. Roane introduces Dallas Willard’s VIM framework (Vision, Intention, Means) to illustrate how people begin the journey toward wholeness, while Ben challenges listeners to recognize why so many get stuck in the early phase and never move forward. Together they describe what a truly healthy, integrated person looks like—someone who lives with peace, awareness, humility, and relational depth. Whether you’re facing betrayal trauma, walking through addiction recovery, or simply seeking emotional and spiritual maturity, this conversation offers clarity, hope, and a practical path toward bringing order to the chaos.
CHAPTERS:
00:00 – Intro
00:26 – Opening Reflections on Friendship, Gratitude, and Survival
01:40 – Navigating Chaos, Betrayal, and Disorientation
03:28 – Introducing the Three Phases of Recovery
04:40 – Phase One: Bringing Order to the Chaos
06:20 – Emotional Dysregulation on Both Sides of Betrayal
08:05 – Vision, Intention & Means (Dallas Willard’s VIM Framework)
12:55 – The Role of Counselors, Guides, and Healthy Community
16:32 – Why Many People Get Stuck in Phase One
18:18 – Phase Two: Deepening Dependence, Commitment, and Community
22:56 – Pain, Consequences, and the Turning Point Toward God
27:56 – Samson Society Ad Break
28:56 – Phase Three: What Mature Recovery Actually Looks Like
31:25 – Wholeness, Eden, and the Christian Journey of Recovery
35:58 – The Marks of a Healthy, Integrated Person
40:24 – Becoming a Person of Peace and Light
45:29 – Outro
HASHTAGS:
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